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the necessary reboot

Howdy. I hope you had an excellent New Year’s celebration. A few weeks have passed, since I’ve updated this. One of my resolutions that I plan to stand by is to write more in this than the past nine months if the variables are right. This post will be a big update, so I hope you’re ready to lend me a few minutes of your time.

The holidays have come and gone. At the end of December, I took my first trip out of town in 2008. Mare fronted me a ticket to Raleigh to spend the Christmas holiday with her family. My flight left on the 23rd, and we returned on the 29th.

In-between, I enjoyed being in another state and away from the chaos of my day job. I had the opportunity to sleep in and do next to nothing without feeling guilty about any of it. We watched movies every night and drank coffee every chance we had. The vacation was very relaxing and much-needed.

I read Watchmen for the first time during the break which was an excellent novel. I’m eager to see the movie. I read Bukowski’s Post Office during the plane rides and at the airports which was a fun and easy read.

I did my best not to think about work and how chaotic it has become, but I ended up doing so much contemplating and devising. I spent plenty of time deciding my next move when I returned to Austin and back to work on Tuesday.

When we returned to Austin on Monday night, K picked us up from the airport and we dined at Pluckers. K and I had the all-you-can-eat special and got our money’s worth. We took another glimpse at the Wall of Flame to make sure our Polaroids were still hanging… all three of them. I told K the news that you’re about to read in the next paragraph.

During the wee hours of Tuesday morning, I composed one of the last opuses that I would write for the corporate entity I spent two and a half years of my life employed with. I typed up my letter of resignation, my two weeks notice.

I only got a few hours of sleep that night and that would cause a chain reaction on my health over the next six days mixed with the stress of making such a big decision for my future and my career.

I was eager to get the discussions over with when I submitted my two weeks notice on Tuesday. I told my immediate supervisor and the manager above him via email that we needed to talk. I also alerted the HR manager, but I was more clear in my message to her. She was the first to respond. We had a half-hour discussion, and I poured my heart out to her. It worked as a practice round; The points were made and she understood.

My manager’s manager was who the two weeks notice was addressed to, and I really wanted to speak to him initially but he was tied up in meetings most of the day. I had a long discussion with my supervisor next. The cards were laid out on the table, and he also understood.

I finally got to chat with the VP of my department, the addressee on my letter of resignation, along with my supervisor in the VP’s office. The VP was initially shocked but could understand. I reiterated for the third time that day the reasons for my decision, and he was able to understand. He gave me options, but he could tell that I wasn’t going to stay.

That was December 30th. The next couple days were company holidays, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. Lucky me. I intended to return to the office on Friday the 2nd, but the cold that started fifteen minutes before I was to leave the office that I probably caught on one of the plane rides got the best of me.

I called in and wrote an email on Friday morning. I felt weak and ill when I woke up and could not gather the strength or energy to make it into the office. I rested for four more hours and worked from home for what would have been the rest of my work day. I did not get as much done as I planned, but it was a half-day plus I was ill. The two-day company holiday became a five-day break for me along with the extended break I took the week before. Bonus.

As much relaxing I did for all of these days, my head has still not cleared. This is the main reason for leaving the company. I’ve become too obsessed with it, and it has detached me from almost everything else in life. I want it all back. I want to leave this behind me. The nature of the beast has become too overwhelming that it has affected my mental stability, and I need to seek other opportunities.

My last day with the company is going to be Tuesday the 13th. Tomorrow will be the first day of my last full week. I have a lot of documentation and training to do along with my daily tasks. This is the result of a lack of resources, talent and determination in a department where a good portion of the burden rests on select individuals.

I entered that place with an expiration date. I knew when I needed to go, and the time has arrived. I’m ready to move on. I need to return to the simple life. I need to not have as much responsibility for a day job as I have been given. I need to gather myself and enjoy life once again. I need to spend more time with my family and friends. These are my resolutions not just for this year but for many years to come.

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